Vacation Rock Cakes

What to do when your internet provider and financial institution conspire against you? Draw on best recollections of the rock cakes from a couple of weeks ago. Less fussy than scones, and on a slightly healthier plane than muffins, rock cakes make an ideal travelling companion. Unlike scones, no cutting is required, so the consistency of the dough is more forgiving of rudimentary holiday measuring equipment. Fruit makes a great accompaniment, as does chocolate spread (yin to the sugar free yang of the cakes).
Preheat oven to 200 degrees C. Scoop 3 mugs of self raising flour into a large bowl. Rub in 3 soup spoons of butter or margarine, so that the mixture resembles fine sand. In the same mug, beat 1 large egg with 1 or 2 spoons of left over cream then top up with sparkling mineral water. Make a well in the flour and pour in the egg mixture, then use the knife blade to mix a sticky dough. Use 2 soup spoons to drop scoops of dough onto a paper lined tray, leaving space for rocks to puff and spread a little. Bake in hot oven for 15 minutes. Serve with freshly chopped fruit and chocolate spread. This quantity makes about 20 cakes; any left overs can be fed to ducks, monitor lizards, crows, bats, or other travelling companions.